Like Mr M (see his cycle blog), I consider the internet is wonderful…most of the time. Except when the Lambeth Conference is in session. Like the run-up to Christmas when I avoid all magazines with screaming headlines like ‘Take it easy! Your 100 point countdown to a laid back festive season!’ I intend to anticipate the Lenten season by fasting from The Church Times (except for the caption competition), all the broadsheets, all the tabloids (which is easy as I rarely read them anyway), and all television (ditto). Honourable exceptions being this site and the Cartoonblog. Oh, and Blogging Anglicans and ….. and…..
Anyway, another honourable exception might be Bishop Alan’s blog, whose ‘Ten rules for cooking up gay schism’ has brightened up a dull Tuesday afternoon no end. Especially Rule 9 :
“Ecclesiology is a very long word. Don’t go there, except for the anoraks on your blog. You have to pretend that the Church of England is a reduced form of the Roman Church at all times, because in fact autocephalous churches are structurally incapable of having schisms in the Roman sense. If that got out the game would be up. Dust over the line between province and diocese at all times like Iran and Iraq. For most of the public, what the hell’s the difference anyway?”
Great stuff! Plus a chance to Improve My Word Power thrown in. Let’s see…’ecclesiology?’ Yes, got that. Does that make me an anorak, though? Oh dear!
It’s ‘autocephalous’ that’s got me beat. As a good upstanding Anglican, am I in an autocephalous church? If so, why? And if not, why not? ‘Auto’ – own? automatic? ‘Cephalous?’ Something to do with heads? Automatic heads? Single heads? Talking heads?? Some obscure term to do with car maintenance? Is Lambeth maybe running a joint drive-thru episcopal car and cassock washing liturgy?
Help me, somebody! Our church is having a grand quiz next weekend and I’d like to go for gold.